The potion of lies
by Ravenclaw Kitti
Summary: Harry is late to potions class, and inconveniently for him, they are brewing amortentia. What starts off as an awkward love confession to a certain Draco Malfoy, soon becomes a strange rumor that's very true. Slytherin gains points, gryffindor looses points, then dumbledore gives everyone points for drarry. THIS IS REALLY STUPID
1. Rewrote version

**A/N: Hewo! Thank you for all your amazing feedback. Honestly, this was just the result of immense boredom during school… And I've decided that I wanna rewrite this, and I have a lot of time due to quarantine. Also, It isn't placed in any specific time zone because the original wasn't.**

**Summary: Harry Potter accidentally tells everyone he's attracted to Draco Malfoy… which totally sucks because Snape is totally embarrassing him… Oh yeah, Dumbledore ships Drarry.**

* * *

The potion of lies:

Harry broke into a run as soon as the school bell rang. Hoping against hope he wouldn't be _too_ late for Potions. He turned the corner to find he was totally lost. Sighing, he checked his pockets for the Marauders map to find it was not there. He groaned and decided to just wander around the halls until he found a familiar hallway.

Harry mentally slapped himself for thinking about Malfoy too much, why must he be so infatuated with him? Malfoy was a complete git to him, yet he always felt attracted to those silver-gray eyes and the faint smell of his hair gel mixed with apples and mint. He sighed. It definitely was not an obsession to know the exact scent of Draco Malfoy… Definitely not…

Actually, Harry could almost smell it… He was drawn to the scent, and followed it until he came into the classroom. When he entered the room, the scent was unbearably strong. Nobody else seemed to notice it. And they were too busy with their potions to notice Harry.

Harry wrinkled his nose, in an attempt to seem normal. Maybe, he could even get off of detention if he made enough of a commotion.

"Eww… Malfoy, how much hair gel did you use this morning?" Harry asked in disgust.

Everyone in the room looked up and stared at him. Malfoy was blushing furiously, and Harry smirked at that, choosing to ignore how beautiful he looked blushing. Malfoy was embarrassed that he had used so much hair gel. Snape was glaring at him, and Hermione gave him a quizzical look. Ron was gaping, soon a lot of the other students were as well.

That is when Harry began to get confused. Why would people be surprised that Harry was revolted by Malfoy's overuse of hair gel?

"What?" Harry demanded, staring at Hermione as she usually had answers.

"Umm… you _do_ know what potion we are making today, right?" Hermione started slowly.

This made Harry much more confused, He didn't keep up with the lesson plans, and why would the potion they were making matter? Maybe Hermione just wanted to flaunt her knowledge on him.

"No," Harry said then after someone chuckled he continued "What does that have to do with the room smelling like Malfoy?"

He felt drunk by the scent, and he realised that it didn't just smell like hair gel, he also was picking up on mint and fresh apples. He suppressed a sigh, and continued to put on a false grossed-out face.

"Everything!" Malfoy finally exclaimed, blushing even redder than before if that was even possible. Harry noticed how pretty his blush looked on his pale skin "Really, Potter… I thought you _hated_ me!"

Now Harry was blushing too. He had no idea what was going on, but he really did like Malfoy a _lot_.

"Of course I hate you… Why wouldn't I hate you… I-I mean we've been enemies for like ever!" Harry rambled on, unconvincingly.

"Harry…" Hermione gave him a hesitant look as she continued slowly "What your smelling is Amortentia…"

Who the bloody hell cared about whatever potion they were brewing? It didn't matter to Harry one bit. Trust Hermione to care more about potions than actually telling him what was going on.

"And why would that be important?" Harry raised his voice louder, and he was thoroughly perplexed. He was starting to get frustrated at everyone.

"Amortentia is a lo-" Hermione began.

"I don't bloody care what Amortentia is! Just tell me what is going on!"

"Fifty points from gryffindor for your language, Mr. Potter!" Snape drawled behind him.

Harry glared at him, and the other Gryffindors glared at Harry in turn.

"Well, I was explaining what was happening. Amortentia is a love-potion, Harry. And it smells just like whatever you're attracted to." Hermione said.

Harry began getting even more perplexed, but then it dawned on him. He gaped. Malfoy began blushing even more and Harry couldn't handle it. Harry really was an idiot…

"Did I just?" Harry yelled in question, feeling very anxious.

"Yes… Potter, you did…" Malfoy chimed in, still blushing as bright as a tomato. He looked like an inverted Weasley with pale hair and bright red skin.

After an immense feeling of embarrassment, Harry walked out of the room… or would have if a slimy yellow hand hadn't grabbed his shoulder. The hand yanked him back, and Harry stared into the face of a particularly annoyed looking Severus Snape. Although, there was some amusement in those dull black eyes.

"And where do you think you're going, Potter?" Snape drawled at him, with a small laugh.

"I'd rather skip class, I already missed half of it so what's the point?" Harry explained then added as an afterthought

"Also, when is my detention going to be?"

"Tomorrow after dinner, if you're not too busy snogging Draco. But Potter, We've all been there." Snape said then added "How do you think everyone found out about your mother and I?"

Harry gagged at that thought… Harry had always believed Lily would've _hated_ Snape. He must've been a slimy git as a child who never used shampoo then too. The idea of his _mother_ being in love with Snape made him gag.

"Wait you- and my _mother_?" Harry asked, still gagging.

"Oh heavens no, I fancied her for years! I would've had her, if it weren't for you!" Snape hissed at Harry.

"What did I do?"

"You existed…" Malfoy chimed in, and Harry glared at him.

Ron seemed to be out of his shocked daze as he exclaimed "Oh shut up, Ferret! Before Harry came in you were like 'Ewwwwww, it smells like Potter!' We all know you secretly love him, and insulting him isn't doing yourself any favours."

Harry was shocked but hopeful, maybe he and Malfoy did have a chance…

"Wait he did?" Harry asked hopefully.

Then Ron gagged "Yeah… I was like 'Bloody Hell, this is insane!'" Then Ron barfed on the floor, and Harry turned his head away to Malfoy, who was blushing even more (if that was even possible).

"That's probably why you haven't got a girlfriend yet, Weasley… You obviously despise human affection." Malfoy hissed, and Harry found himself glaring at him

"Hey, what about Hermione. _She's_ my girlfriend! You say _I _despise human affection when you're not even man enough to tell Harry how head-over-heels you are with him!" Ron retorted.

"Wait, so we're just going to accept that they fancy each other?" Seamus cut in before Malfoy could offer a retort, everyone nodded and Seamus shrugged "Seems fair, carry on. This is juicy tea, and I _love_ being a side-character in this!"

Seamus then began to munch on some popcorn and began passing bags of the stuff around. Harry shrugged, and slapped Snape's hand away from him, realising that he was still holding his shoulder.

"Granger hardly counts as a human being, she's a mudblood bookworm with no-" Malfoy retorted.

"You take that back!" Harry and Ron both yelled simultaneously.

Hermione glared at Malfoy and everyone launched into an argument. Popcorn was thrown around the room, somehow Snape had made his way across the room and stood on one of the tables. Harry took that chance to grab Malfoy's pale hand and whisper to him that they should really get out of here and start snogging. They both slipped out of the room unnoticed.

* * *

Ron was utterly confused, how was it possible for so many things to happen in a short 10 minutes? First Malfoy told the whole class he was in love with Harry Potter, Ron's best mate, and then Harry ran in and said the same. What was the world coming to? Somehow amidst the quarreling, Snape had stood on one of the tables.

"Ten million points from Gryffindor for causing this fight, and ten billion points to Slytherin for Draco's obvious genius!" Snape cried out amidst the quarreling.

Ron groaned inwardly. He hated Snape and slytherin house even more at this moment. There was much more Quaralling, and Ron began blaming the stupid slytherins for this. Hermione was spouting out facts, and everyone hated it. Just then the door opened, and Dumbledore and McGonagall came bursting in. Everyone stopped fighting instantly, and the whole room was silent.

"Severus, Why does Gryffindor have negative 10 Million points and Slytherin has Billions of points added? You know how I try so hard to make Gryffindor win!" asked Dumbledore _***Calmly***_.

Ron grinned, Dumbledore was on their side! That meant Gryffindor would probably get more points then Slytherin, and inevitably win for just breathing!

"I dunno, ask Potter!" Severus frantically said, as he pointed to Harry's empty seat.

"Severus?" McGonagall asked suspiciously and flipped her golden curls- wait this _isn't _Hogwarts school of Prayer and miracles? Oh…- McGonagall's hair was quite brunette and not curly in any way, so she acted in character, and gave Snape the sternest look in the world.

Ron was thoroughly confused, what the heck was Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles? He knew what praying was… but it was something muggles did, not too many Wizards acted that way… maybe it was on another planet, like Pigfarts.

"Snape was being the horrible teacher he is, and he insulted my OTP!" Neville complained.

"What's an OTP?" Asked every single person in the class in unison, including the side characters that have been neglected.

"One True Pairing!" Neville enthused, "I just think that Harry and Malfoy would be the cutest couple ever!"

"What-" Ron started.

"The-" Hermione interrupted.

"Actual-" Ron continued.

"FRIKKKKKKKKKKKKK," Everyone in the class finished- except for Draco, Harry, Dumbledore, and Neville- in unison(really, you'd think they had practiced it.)

Then they realised that _Dumbledore_ himself was one of the silent ones. It was odd. Everyone stared at Dumbledore with the exact same look of disbelief upon their faces.

"I totally ship it as well!" Dumbledore explained, excitedly "500 trillion points to Gryffindor and Slytherin for providing us with Drarry! What exactly happened, by the way?"

"WHYYYYYY?" Snape bellowed.

Seamus and Dean both explained to Dumbledore what had been happening, and Dumbledore almost exploded out of joy. Dumbledore turned out to be a major Drarry shipper, which was a surprise to absolutely nobody. Ron was mortified, but he soon found himself accepting it… If it meant Harry was happy, then it was alright. Ron turned to tell Harry that, but he wasn't there…

"Wait, has anybody seen Harry?" Ron asked, interrupting the confused conversation and Dumbledore giving a lengthy speech as to why it should be mandatory to ship Drarry in order to attend Hogwarts.

"I have no idea…" Blaise Zabini replied, he turned his head to Draco's empty seat then continued "That's strange… Draco seems to be missing too…"

Realisation dawned on the whole class. Nobody said a word, as the whole class simultaneously got out of their seats and started creeping out of the class room super sneaky style. When they reached a corner, Ron peeked the corner and giggled when he saw Harry and Malfoy snogging passionately.

"They're snogging," Ron whispered to the nearest student he could find, who happened to be Hermione.

Soon the whole class knew, and Dumbledore allowed them to interrupt classes in order to keep the gossip mill running.

* * *

Draco grinned into his and Harry's kiss, his dream was coming true… He was kissing Harry freakin Potter, the man of his dreams, his one true love… That was when Harry pulled away, and Draco hissed at him and attempted to kiss him again. Harry stepped on his foot, and Draco opened his eyes to see The Weaslette tapping her foot impatiently.

"What do you want?" Draco drawled.

"That doesn't concern you!" The Weaslette glared and then turned towards Harry "Guess what I heard? Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy were snogging! Insane, right?"

Draco had to contain his laughter. Gryffindors were the most idiotic people sometimes…

"Oh, thanks for telling us. We would've _never_ guessed!" Draco retorted, sarcastically.

"No one asked for _your _opinion, _ferret_!" The Weaslette hissed.

Harry burst out laughing, and Draco had to force himself to remain calm. Draco held on to Harry as he laughed.

"What's so funn-" Ginny began but then her eyes widened "Oh… I'M THICK!"

"Ditto," Draco commented, he allowed himself to chuckle a bit, but was cut short by Harry stepping on his foot again.

"C'mon Draco, you gotta be nice to my friends!" Harry scolded.

Draco had no idea how Harry expected him to be nice to his friends, when they acted so idiotic. Even Crabbe and Goyle were smarter than this.

"Fine," Draco replied reluctantly, as Ginny blushed and walked off.

Draco took that moment to kiss Harry once more, and then he came to the realisation that he hadn't heard the bell… yet the hallways were packed with students. Nobody cared that they had lost what Professor McGonagall would call valuable class time, because Dumbledore shipped Drarry. Nobody interfered with Dumbledore's OTP.

The rest of the school got to enjoy a day off, and they all silently thanked Draco and Harry for choosing today to get together, as there were multiple exams today, and everyone just wanted a break.


	2. Original

Hi! this is just a quick drarry me and my friend worked on. Sorry it doesn't have a specific time line since my friend only read the first 3 books. I didn't want to spoil anything for him :P. This is a crack fic, and is immensely stupid.

The potion of lies:

The potion of lies

Imagine this.

Harry is late for potions class and walks in and says.

"Ewww Malfoy, how much hair gel did you use this morning? It reeks!"

Everyone stares at Harry, and Harry exclaims "What!?"

Hermione goes "Umm you do know what potion we're making today right?"

"No," Harry says then adds "What does that have to do with the room smelling like Malfoy"

"Everything!" Draco goes and is blushing, "Really potter, I thought you hated me!"

"I do hate you!" Harry retorts.

"What you're smelling is amortentia…" Hermione replies hesitantly.

"And why is that important?" Harry questions.

"Amortentia is a love potion which, smells like whatever you're attracted too."

"And?" Harry starts then realizes "Uh…. OH, DID I JUST-?"

"Yes Potter, you did," Draco said still embarrassed.

Harry then walks out of the room or would have if Snape hadn't stopped him.

"And where do you think you're going, Potter?"

"I'd rather skip class."

"We've all been there potter, how do you think everyone found out about your mother and me?"

Harry vomits a little "Wait you- you and my mother?"

"Heavens no, I fancied her for years, and it would have been perfect… if not for you."

"What did I do?"

"You existed." Draco chimed in.

"Oh shut up ferret, before Harry came in you were like 'Ewwwwww gross I smell potter'" Hermione retorted.

"Wait he what?" Harry said hope slipping into his voice.

"Yeah, I was like 'bloody hill," Ron said as he too barfed.

"That explains why you haven't got a girlfriend yet. You despise human affection." Draco retorted.

"Hey, what about Hermione. She's my girlfriend! You say I despise human affection when you're not even man enough to tell Harry how head-over-heels you are with him!" Ron retorted.

"Wait, we're just gonna accept that they both love each other?" Seamus cut in before Draco could offer a retort. Everyone nodded.

"Granger hardly counts as a human being, she's just a book-worm with no-" Draco began.

"You take that back!" Harry and Ron yelled at the same time.

Hermione glared at Draco, and everyone instantly started arguing.

"Ten million points from Gryffindor for causing this fight, and ten billion points to Slytherin for Draco's obvious genius!" Snape cried out amidst the quarreling.

Everyone in the room went silent when McGonnagal and Dumbledore walked into the room.

"Severus, why does Gryffindor have negative 10 million points and Slytherin has billions of points added?" Dumbledore questioned Snape suspiciously.

"I dunno, ask Harry!" Snape replied pointing his hand to Harry's now empty chair, not bothering to notice that Harry was no longer in the room.

"Severus?!" McGonagall replied suspicion also entering her voice.

"Snape was being evil and making fun of my OTP!" Neville complained.

"What is an OTP?" every single person in the room asked.

"One True Pairing. I just think Harry and Malfoy would be the best couple ever!"

"What-" Ron started.

"The-" Hermione interrupted.

"Actual-" Ron continued.

"FRIKKKKKKKK" everyone finished except for Draco, Harry, Neville, and Dumbledore.

Everyone stared at the silent Dumbledore.

"Hey, I totally ship it as well! 500000 trillion points to Slytherin and Gryffindor for providing us with Drarry!"

"WHYYYYYY, I mean why must Gryffindor share the victory?" Snape cried.

No one noticed that Harry and Draco where in fact no longer in the room, it would seem during the fighting that they slipped out of the potions classroom.

"Wait for a second, wheres Harry?" Ron's concerned voice made everyone stop fighting.

"I don't know, Draco seems to be missing too." Blaise Zabini replied.

Everyone creeped out the classroom tiptoeing trying to be discreet, one student peeked around the corner and giggled.

"They are snogging!" Said student whispered to the nearest person he could find.

Soon everyone knew about it and students from the potions class started interrupting other classes to spread the news to everyone.

It eventually got around to Harry and Draco when Ginny Weasley tapped harry's shoulder when he was in the middle of snogging Draco.

"Guess what harry? Did you know that someone saw Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy snogging in the hallway?" Ginny asked.

"Oh thanks for telling us, we would have never guessed," Draco replied sarcastically.

"No one asked for you're opinion, MALFOY." Ginny glared.

Harry just burst out laughing.

"What's so funny- oh …. IM AN IDIOT!" Ginny exclaimed.

"I second that!" Draco replied and got a kick from Harry.

"Come on Draco, you gotta be nice to my friends!" Harry snapped.

"Fine," Draco replied as Ginny walked away to retell the story.

In the haze, everyone seemed to forget that it was the middle of classes. No one really cared though, because Dumbledore wanted this. No-one stopped Dumbledore from allowing them to have a free period just because Dumbledore was a Drarry shipper.


End file.
